Here I sit......part 1.

Wow, its been a while. Time sure flies when you're having, well umm.... I wouldn't really call it fun.

Let's see, where did I leave everyone hanging? Oh, training for the 3 Day and my first good size gain - that was my last real post in May. Gosh, SO much has happened since then.

To make a long story short, the end of 2010 was totally a year to remember but not for good reasons. I will touch quickly on the events, though each could easily take an entire blog post.

It got to the point where maintaining a house hold of nine (remember, my brother in law and kids were living with us) on one income was not feasible any longer and we became a statistic. Our house went into foreclosure in July and we moved in August. In the mean time, my brother in law gained custody of his kids, moved out on his own and got married. We were so happy and proud for him.

Shortly after moving into our new house, Mistee was let go from her job. She had been with the company for almost seven years and planned on retiring with the company.

September was the month of Doodle's second birthday. Through weeks of planning and discussions with his parents, it was decided he would go home after his second birthday. We had the baby and cared for him solely from the time he was 5 months old. It was a very very hard decision to make, though we felt it was the best decision for all involved. His parents came down from Va and we celebrated his birthday with his many friends and family. We then packed him up into their car and sent him on to his next journey.

The next couple of weeks were full of walking and training for the 3 Day walk, along with trying to find some type of normalcy in a new house with out Doodle.

On October 28th, I received the phone call that will forever change my life. My aunt, whom I had lost contact with, was calling to tell me that my mother had passed away early that morning. A couple of weeks prior, she had fallen and broke her ankle. She needed several screws to repair the damage. The day after having her cast removed, she became ill and passed the next morning. A blood clot had released from her leg which traveled to her lung, causing a pulmonary embolism. My mother and I had a rocky relationship for many years. However, we were both relieved that it was improving and were both excited for what the future would bring. October 28th was also my fathers birthday, who passed when I was young. It also was the day that one of my dearest friends had her first baby.

The very next day we found out that Mistee's father was ill. On November 2nd he became critical and Mistee left for Oklahoma. November 2 was also the day my mother was memorialized. November 2nd is also my birthday.

I was in the middle of a very large mental crunch regarding the 3 Day walk. I spent several months training physically and raising the needed funds. However, participating in the walk would prevent me from attending my mom's memorial. For many reasons, including financial and to honor my mother, I did the walk.

The 3 Day walk was AMAZING! Though honestly, I was mentally not there for most of the time. I physically was not able to complete the full 60 miles though I did do 48 of them. On the last day, November 7th, I had exactly 5 miles left to finish the weekend and Mistee called. Her father passed away just a few minutes prior. That led to a whole other level of emotions. Sadness that Skip passed, guilt for not being there to support Mistee and anger that all of these situations were happening to us all with in weeks of each other. I finished the walk with no one to cheer me on and with no one at the finish line or closing ceremonies. I know its not the fault of anyone involved. However, it was the best physical accomplishment of my life and also one of the saddest moments because no one was there to share it with me.

The next weekend, the boys and I packed up and headed to Oklahoma for Skip's memorial. When we returned home, we found that someone had broken into our house. The only thing that was missing was the boys' "Mickey Bucket", the change jar they save money in for our next Disney vacation. While I'm grateful they did not take more, I wish they had not taken something that belonged to my children.

Needless to say, these "issues" among others - refrigerator going out, unemployment issues, etc did more than set back my weight loss efforts. Nutrition and staying active all went to the way side. Honestly, on more than one occasion my boys had cereal or pop tarts for dinner. I just didn't have the mental capacity to do much more.

The scale this morning said 228.3 exactly 25 pounds higher than my lowest weight this year.

Am I disappointed in this? Yes. However, do I blame or judge myself for the weight gain? Uh, no. I'm actually pretty surprised that I didn't have more of an overall gain. I am still 32 pounds lighter than my highest weight.

New Blog and Tracee's Giveaway!!

So much for me trying to maintain my weight loss blog and keep up with all my 3 Day stuff at the same time huh??

As far as weight loss goes - I'm still maintaining what Ive lost Im sitting firm at 213. Not great but at least Im not gaining. Working out has become non existent for me - that is hard core Jillian style work outs. However, through training for the 3 Day Im walking long distances at least three times a week. Sunday we did 5 miles and Ill go for 6 tonight. Ive bumped my calories up to between 1500 and 1600 vs the 1200-1300 I was doing before. That with the lack of hard work outs - Im sure that's why I'm not dropping weight more. Im totally ok with this. Of course, Id like to have it come off quicker but Im really trying to teach myself to have a better relationship with food. We all go through periods of time in our lives that are more stressful, we have things going on, etc. I want this to be a life long change. If I can have a large weight loss over a few months, then maintain for a few months Im totally good. I would hate to drop all the weight and then not know how to maintain it - only to gain it all back.
So, that's where Im sitting.


Ive decided to start a new blog. Im reading so many 3 Day blogs, Id like to write on that subject as well. However, I know the readers I have are here because of my weight loss journey. So, Ill spare you guys the talks about hydration (though we all know how important that is!), blisters, little pink tents and boobs! Im working on the layout and first post of the new blog now - Blisters for Sisters. Don't expect to not hear about breast cancer on Ramblings of a fat girl at all, cause its gonna happen. This is an important topic people. We should all be concerned. Think - really seriously think of eight women - give them names. Who did you think of? Your mother? Sister? Daughter? Best friend?

Here's my eight:
Mistee, my best friend, team mate and partner.
Jessica one of my closest friends and team mate.
Jennifer a team mate and also a good friend.
Buffy - my boys God mother, a great friend and team mate.
Cheryl - my soon to be sister in law and team mate.
Peggy - my mother.
MaKayla - my niece who's 7.
Ms. Jean - one of my gremlins who's 19 months old and a light in my eye.

There's my eight. They all have names and are all very close in my heart. What's the point to this, you ask? Statically, one of them will be personally diagnosed with breast cancer. You and I both know that my list and your list of women (or future women) could have been much much longer. Not only do I not want these women to be affected by this disease personally, I dont want them to be affected by it at all. Ms Jean is only a toddler and God willing, may never be diagnosed with breast cancer, but she may lose a mother, aunt, grand mother or close friend. I dont want to see Ms Jean hurt - physically or emotionally. Thats why I walk. And that's why I do my part to help find an end to this disease - for my list of eight, their list of eight and their list of eight and all the future lists of eight.

Who's your list of eight?

On a lighter note -- let me introduce all of you to Tracee. Tracee is a wonderful woman and parent. She is the only human on the planet I trusted to keep Monkey on a regular basis when I worked out side of my home. Some days I wish shed take him now! :)
She has a great blog, Mothering in a Shoe and posted a fantastic giveaway she today! She's giving away a DaVinci Bracelet and three beads. Ive never gotten hooked on Pandora beads however, I can so see these becoming an addiction! They're cute, customizable and wont cost a fortune! So, with or with out winning her give away - I'm pretty sure I know what I'm going to ask for for my birthday (on top of the New Balance walking shoes Ive been drooling over).




Thats all for today folks! Toon in later - same bat time, same bat channel!

Weight loss updates.....

Last weekend I had my first gain - like 6 pounds in a matter of three days! I was pissed to say the least! However, I'm really thinking its mostly due to sodium/water. I haven't been drinking water like I should be and I can feel it.

Last weekend was our first team training session for our 3 Day walk in November. We got up early, rubbing our eyes. The coffee drinkers grabbed a cup and we were on our way! Right now were walking on the ACU trail. Its two miles around, paved and really pretty. We'll stay there for a couple of weeks, then move to other locations to acclimate ourselves to different walking areas, hills and curbs. Sunday, we walked 4 miles then went for breakfast. As we were eating, one of the other girls and I decided to go back and walk another 4 miles. Fun!
So far this week, Ive clocked in 17 miles.

Because Ive been so busy with fund raising, planning and researching for the team - my eating habits have been horrible! But totally not in the way you'd expect. Im not eating enough! For example, yesterday I ate 2 eggo waffles with syrup for breakfast. At 6:30 last night it occured to me I had ONLY eaten those two waffles - all day. We had Taco Bell for dinner. I didnt go over my calories for the day but of course went way over on sodium.

My 6 pound gain is gone and I'm back to where I was before. Im sitting at 213 as of this morning. I have two months to get down to onderland to make the goal I set for myself. I would really like to think that will happen. If it doesn't Im going to be not a happy camper! However, I am totally aware of how my priorities are shifted right now. I'm not putting EVERYTHING into getting this weight off. While it is still top on my list - I am team leader of 7 other girls (we got a new walker!). These girls are all looking forward to this walk and I want us to be successful. I will not let them down and I will not let myself down!

I figure the weight loss will come hand in hand with the training were doing. I just have to continue to watch what I put into my mouth. But isnt that the whole point of a life change?

I know I havent been around much and Im sorry - I appreciate all of the support from everyone!

Im still here!!

Hi guys!! I received a comment from Jessica at CBGBlog a couple of days ago asking if I was ok.

First of all, how stinkin sweet is she??


Yes, I am still here! I'm trying to stay caught up on everyone's postings but it is becoming difficult for me. No, I haven't fallen off of the wagon. I'm still eating well and am working out - in my mind. Who am I kidding? Since we've been back from our vacation - I haven't worked out but maybe five times total.

As of Wednesday - I am clocking in at 215. A total of 45 pounds gone. I'm almost halfway to my goal! Whoot!


So, let me explain why I've been pulled into 15 different directions --

Ive talked some about my walk in this years Susan G Komen 3 Day for the Cure in Dallas this coming November. Well, my little adventure has since turned into a seven man team. And I'm talking to three other girls about walking with us too.
Each person who commits to walking this walk - also commits to raising $2,300. That's a total of $16,100 so far for the team to raise. These numbers are insane for a new team full of first time walkers.

Look what is happening here --- my little personal goal of losing weight, becoming healthy and walking 60 miles (as my own personal fitness goal) has turned into raising over SIXTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS for a fantastic cause!! I could not be more proud of what is happening here - right in front of my eyes.

I get phone calls and texts every day from team members who get donations. "I got $20!" "I just got one for $50!" This morning, one of my best friend IMd me saying "I just got at $200 donation!" The team is all so excited and encouraged by what we are going - its amazing.

Right now, my fund raising account sits at $475.91. That money has been raised in only TEN donations. I'm absolutely overwhelmed at the support we are getting from friends and family members. Ive also been absolutely overwhelmed by the information I have learned about my friends and family members. I have learned that some of them have lost friends, aunts, cousins, and sisters to this horrible disease. Ive also learned that a few have dealt with this disease themselves.

Do you guys know

Over 1.3 million women are diagnosed globally through out a year.
Somewhere in the world, a woman dies from breast cancer every 68 seconds.

These numbers are insane to me.

Susan G Komen died from this disease in 1980. She was 36 years old. She passed only 3 years after her diagnosis. In 1980, the five year survival rate for breast cancer was 78%. Since then, through the help and funding from the Susan G Komen Organization, that number is now 98%.

98%

Read it again - 98% and yet STILL someone dies every 68 seconds.

If that doesn't drive you to want to change things, nothing will. I know of four women who have personally been affected by this disease - one of which has had a double mastectomy. Another had a single mastectomy and is now having issues with her other breast. She will be having a biopsy next week. I have no doubt, none at all, that one if not all of these women would be dead now, if it weren't for this organization.

How would your children survive with out their mother? How would you survive with out your mother, best friend, sister? How would you survive if, God forbid, you had to bury your daughter.

ONE in EIGHT women will be diagnosed with this disease. Look around you. How many family members do you have? How many friends do you have? How many blogs do you follow? I follow 59 blogs. Statistically, at least 7 of the bloggers I follow will receive this diagnosis. Jack Sh*t, you are not immune - roughly 2,000 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer this year alone.

So, that's why Ive been missing the last week or so. I'm becoming passionate about this cause and I haven't even walked my first walk.

My first walk -- TOMORROW! The Komen Organization has 5Ks all over the country. If 60 miles is too much for you - find a 5K. I know there will be two in Dallas this year alone. Were getting up at 4:30 to drive the tree hours to attend this event. Bubba is so excited!

Speaking of Bubba - he has volunteered to do anything and everything the team needs to do to help the team raise money. With his birthday money he bought two spools of pink ribbon to make into the classic pink ribbon pins. He's walking the 5K and has even volunteered to wear a bra on the outside of his clothes and a pink wig during our fund raising events. He is disappointed he can not walk in the 3 Day but I have no doubt this will not be my only year to walk. He only has 6 years to wait.

We have several fund raisers planned - we dont have a Krispy Kreme down here so they sell like hot cakes. They have a great fund raising program so we'll do a few donut sales. We'll also be doing a few car washes, a flamingo flocking project and bake sales in front of Walmart. I have a meeting with my church's board to discuss a spaghetti dinner and pancake dinner. A friend of mine has offered her Scentsy business as a fund raiser. The team will get 25% of the profit sales for three weeks. We will start that next week. So, if you know of Scentsy and would like to place an order - just let me know. I'll pay for the shipping to save you money. And if you'd like to help us sell -- I can send you the order forms - and again, I will pay for the shipping to get the items to you. If you dont know what Scentsy is, you don't know what your missing!

If you'd like to help me by donating, please follow this link. All donations are completely tax deductible. If an individual or company donation is made in the amount of $500 or more, the name of the company or individual is printed on the back of our team shirts. Also, my personal dedication is that anyone who makes a donation of any dollar amount, who has a loved one lost or fighting this disease I will personally write their loved ones name on the shirt I will wear to walk my 60 miles.

Guess What I Got!!

We have a local Yahoo! group named Abilene Garage Sales. The whole idea is if you have something to sell or looking to buy - you post an email to the group. If someone wants what your selling, they email you directly. Its like Craigs list - only on a smaller level and with out the rapes and murder. I dont know about you but to me, that's a good thing!

Anyway, a couple of days ago a guy posted that he was selling an Exerspy. I had no clue what it was and deleted the email. But for some reason, I went back and actually read the post. Holey personal trainer in a box!!

The armband records calories burned, moderate and intense physical activity, sleep times , sleep efficiency and steps taken. The software (you pay a monthly fee for this) gives you the ability to track calories in, weight and measurements. There are tons of resources available on information like performance, muscle gain, weight loss, women's health, pain relief, supplements etc

I bought the spy from the guy for $50. The online program is $10 a month. When I brought it home - it didn't work right out of the box. I received an error message when trying to connect it to the pc through the usb cord. That night I emailed tech support. Less than 24 hours later, I received an email back from Chad in the tech office. He knew exactly what the problem was and gave me great detailed info on how to fix it. Ten minutes later I was up and running! I also received a comment on a post I made on the companies Facebook. Wow! Customer service rocks!

So far, I love the program! The one and only small downfall is that I'm having to manually input almost all of my food. Their data base just doesn't have the amount of food as what Sparkpeople has. However, the small amount of time it takes to input the nutritional counts of the food I eat is WAY worth it. I love having the ability to plug the little gadget into the computer and look at all of my stats for the day. I can tell you that I burn more calories when I'm up cleaning my house vs sitting on my butt all day. Duh - I know, but its great to see it right in front of your face. I like being able to log into it and see the little graph go up after Ive done something like laundry or playing with the kids. I'm excited to see what its going to do when I get a real work out in. The armband is comfortable though if my arm were much bigger, Id need a bigger arm strap. Ive worn it to bed the last two nights and have had no problem sleeping with it on and it doesn't slip out of position. The only time the arm band can not be worn is when showing or in the pool. But the system tracks when the arm band is not on. You can however, input what you were doing at that time - so you're not out on burned calories for that time frame.

So far I love this program! I'm excited to see what all it has to offer as I learn more about it. I will definitely let you all know how it goes!

My first 5K!!

Last week I saw a commercial for The Mayors 5K. Its a race here in Abilene, downtown. In several of your blogs, I read where you're training for one, are doing one or have done one. "What the hell? Why not?" I thought. I didn't know anyone who was doing it but was willing to even go by myself. However, I got the great idea to talk to Bubba about it. Im SO glad I did. He wanted to do it and was super excited. Saturday was his birthday - what a great way to start it!

We got up early that morning and headed down there. Wow! What fun! We found a couple of girls that go to our church and walked with them. We finished in just a little over 51 minutes. Our time could have been much better - but we were chit chatting and having fun with it. Bubba asked me to run several times but I just wasn't up for it. Not yet. Plus, I had a back pack on that was real floppy and not comfortable. I wouldn't have been able to run if I wanted to.

After the 5K there was a little 1 mile fun run. We were already there so we did that one too - just walked it though. Right before that started - look who we saw!

Melissa is not my favorite on the show but was really nice in person. You never know what someone is edited to be like on a reality show.

So, Bubba and I have a new hobby!! Our second one is this weekend - at the Ft Worth Zoo. I want our time to be at least 45 minutes, if not less. We also have one planned for the 24th - the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure. YAY!! Who knows what other races we'll do. Weve also looked at a couple of half marathons. I think he's nuts but he says we can do it.

We also have a plan - Next year at the Mayors 5K - we will run. Not only will we run the entire race but we will metal. We have a year to train. We can do it!

Ive been registered to walk the Susan Komen 3 Day for the Cure for several months now but Bubba can not participate in that one. He's too young by their standards. Plus, I really feel that's a lot for him physically - 60 miles is a heck of a lot. And once you get started there's no turning back. Well, there IS but - I don't want to have to turn back with him.

Me registering for the 3Day was the start of my transformation. I really felt the desire to do it but knew there was no way I could complete it in the condition I was in. That's when I broke out the treadmill and actually GOT ON IT. 40 pounds down and a whole lot more energy later -- I still am not ready to walk 60 miles. But I'm getting there.

I don't have breast cancer and can thankfully say I have no personal connections to it. But I STRONGLY believe that this 60 mile walk has saved my life - before I even walked it. I will walk it - EVERY. DAMN. MILE. Because I can. There are so many women who can't walk. They cant walk because of the chemo - others can't walk because they've lost their battle. So, I will because I can.

I started a team with some friends of mine. There are 5 of us total going to walk this walk. None of us have done it before.

In order to take the first step in this walk - we have to raise $2,300 each. No ifs, ands or buts. No fund raising - no walking.

There's a link on my side bar to my personal fund raising page. If you have it in you - $5, $10, $20, $100 or $500. What ever you can - Ill take it! For donations of $50 - Ill honor a loved one with their name on the shirt Ill wear or the flag Ill wave when I walk. Also, the adds on my page are all AdSense - I get paid when you follow the links. You don't have to buy a thing - just click, click, CLICK. All that I get from the AdSense goes directly to my walk fund.

If you want, and will - write a post on your blog about my walk - spread the word - link your friends to me - **Would LOVE if J*ck Sh*t got the word and spread it, hint hint. :) **

Let them all know what I'm doing, what the cause is and how they can help. If I have to hawk my youngest child to get the funds to walk this walk - I will. Though that would suck. So, PLEASE for the love of Monkey - help me!!

FOURTY pounds gone and photo comparison challenge

This morning I weighed in at 220.6.

What does that mean???

2.2 pounds gone this week so far - my "official" weigh in day is Sunday

11.8 pounds gone in a month (from 3-9 to today)


FOURTY pounds gone total!!

Whoot!! You couldn't beat that with a sharp stick!



A couple of days ago I told you guys about Jessica's photo comparison challenge.


Here's the results of my challenge!

My Before pic, taken January of 2010:


And my After pic, taken Easter day 2010:


Look!! I have a neck!! I have one chin instead of three. You can see a defined jaw line and cheek bones. You probably don't know by just looking but my smile is very forced in the first picture. I was trying to be a good mom by riding the ride with Monkey but I was not happy about it. I was stuffed into the seat and very uncomfortable. Though we haven't been there since, I know that I will fit into the seat much better. The biggest difference? Notice I said in the before pic I was TRYING to be a good mom. In the after pic, I had just gotten done putting up the 20 ft pool for the boys - Ive never actually participated in putting up a pool before. Ive only watched. I'm not trying to be a good mom anymore - I AM a good mom!